| Oct. 17th, 2009 @ 01:36 am Worst Week... This Year. |
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Current Location: At Work. Not much longer anyway.
I am currently...:  distressed
I'm listening to: rain plattering outside doing an overly fitting background orchestra here...
When the shit hits the fan, it does so here spectacularly fast and high.
Grissom died after all. He was better, then got worse again. I took him to Hamburg with me in my parents' car and went to the vet again, but there was nothing to do after all. He was quite old already and that drasted infection wouldn't go away. I kept him warm and fed best I could, but in the end I could just sit and wait. In the end he died in my arms on Sunday evening. He's buried now under the rose-bushes in our garden. I miss him terribly. Monday's been the first time in two years I went home and couldn't say "Hey, I'm back" to anyone. It feels empty and silent. It's so sad, I've grown attached very much to my little wish-mop. I hope he nibbles lots of greens and seeds in heaven...
The baptism was very nice, of course, but I couldn't really enjoy it at the time. I made a ton of photos though. Nina is a very adorable baby. Even if she's a drama queen in the making. *g*
Tuesday, my boss called telling me they were going to cut my hours down by two thirds (!) because they couldn't afford to pay me more. Instead, she wanted to take over my evening shifts herself. But of course I'd still be welcome to work the weekend night shift. And then she hung up on me. For the record, that means I'd earn 30€ a week. I was a bit peeved.
Wednesday, my boss' husband called telling me that there *may be* some other shift I could take, but it was all quite unspecific and I was asked to swing by on Thursday - I told him that I might not be able to make it.
Because after all, I had that very important exam on Thursday so I tried to concentrate on that first - it went horribly, I was expecting something else entirely. Also, the prof was sitting alone with me in the room, right opposite of me. I was so nervous. No idea whether I made it or not. I'm also working on that last paper - missed the deadline, but maybe the prof isn't so much of an ass and lets me hand it in on Monday still. *holds thumbs and writes like mad* I should have made it, but I didn't feel all too well after all.
And tonight I went to work. I'm currently sitting at the office. It will be the last time for me.
I came to take over shift from my boss at 1am. When I asked (very nicely) about the maybe-solution my boss snapped. She flat-out told me "NOT NOW." - to which I naturally replied "Tomorrow then?" - After all, I need to know if it's time to go looking for a new job to support myself, right? But, apparently, that was too much for the frazzled nerves of my employer. Aside from already looking very exhausted and grey and all over NOT good (I get that she's been working 19 hours straight each day this week, since I wasn't there at all and no one else has been doing more shifts than regular...) she went bonkers, accusing me of, and I quote, trying to blackmail her, being an overly demanding person and always getting on her nerves from the very beginning, and just being to naive to notice..
I was so dumbstruck, I must have stared at her for about five seconds. Then her husband said "Sorry, she's through for today. We'll settle this next week." Me: "I'd rather do it tomorrow, please?" He: (snappish) "Okay, tomorrow then."
I kind of played with the thought of giving back my keys and leaving. But I didn't. I hold myself for a much too nice person for that kind of behaviour.
But then, five minutes later he came over to my night-shift office, handing me the plan I'd forgotten and said "Well, it's your fault for not coming over on Thursday." I said: "But I told you, important exam. I couldn't afterwards." "Well, now we can't!" he answered, quite loud and, well, in a fit of pique. And left, without a word of good bye.
... That's why I decided it's time to move on. I'll collect tonights' pay tomorrow afternoon, clear out my locker, give back the keys. They can go find someone else for tomorrow's night shift.
If they can't bother sparing five minutes to clear a possible working schedule with me so I might know if I can pay this month's rent after cutting off the major part of my income and make a fuss over a simple question for which I feel I have every right to, then I'm not sorry at all to ditch them, too. She can go and work herself to death for all I care. I'm just sorry because I really enjoyed working here after all. The colleagues were very friendly in general, and the customers cause often more laughter than dismay (even though there are a few special-cakes ^^) I'm also sorry I'm ranting so much about it but I'm kind of flustered at the moment. Anyway, I rather quit before I get myself fired for... being a too demanding person perhaps. Not that I can say I've done anything to warrant it to the best of my knowledge, as I always try to give my best at any job, but they might find a silly reason after all.
I'm mad.
Well, fuck it. Or,
TL,DR: Life sucks, I'm going home to eat a giant ice cream sundae in a few hours, finish the goddamn paper and go looking for a job first thing on Monday morning.
I'm not going to let this shitty week bring me down. It's just even worse for I can't go and complain to Grissom about The Suck. He at least cheered me right back up. I really miss him. |
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